November 27, 2012
I had an art studio for half a year and it was one of the
best things I have ever thrown money into. It was all
about parties, drugs, sex, and art. It was walking
distance from downtown San Jose, it was also right
by where all the prostitutes “hang out” a dream come
true for yours truly.
During the last month of my stay I went downtown
for a night of fun, ended up drinking a little too much
and ended up meeting up with a friend who was in a
far more intoxicated state than I was. We went back
to my studio for a drunken sex party.
From what I remember it was so much fun.
I don’t know how I managed to get some ok pictures
that drunk. The light source was fluorescent light
so everything came out greenish. This are some of
the photos of that night.
November 24, 2012
I have been up and down the Bay Area following
a cross dresser Ximena Monroe for quite some while
now, I think its been more than a year, pursuing
her dream of attaining a pageant crow.
I met her coming out of my favorite night club
in San Jose, lido’s night club. Lido’s night club
is a two story club, the first floor plays Mexican
banda music and attracts that type of crowd, just think
of a room full of Mexican cowboys minus the horses.
the second floor caters to the Vietnamese karaoke crowd,
most of which are a some what an older crowd, but
goddamn it do they get down. They also have some very
pretty asian girls, ALL THE TIME!! This makes for a
weird dynamic and it creates a disturbance in
the force field. Lido’s attracts all types of “outcasts” from
the industrial goths, ghetto homeless, trannys, cross
dressers, cowboys, Asian women( @_@ drool), thugs,
the handy-cap and an over all a conglomerate of WTF!
I could write about Lido’s night club and my experiences
all night long.
Lido’s holds two weekly tranny//cross dresser shows,
and at the end of the night I approached along with two
friends a group of the performers and chopped it up with
them. I asked if one of them would be down to do a
documentary. To my surprise one of them said she was
down to do so.
We recently went to Salinas pride because she was
to be crowned as Salinas’ queen. I was pumped
about it because she had been working hard for
this moment, and was honored to be asked to
come along as her photographer.
The day prior to Salinas pride I had taken a bunch
of LSD with enough left over to last me through
the event. I got no sleep at all(one of the effects of
LSD) and was playing out the event in my head
though out my high.
It was a dope ass event I have never seen more tattooed,
pierced, and modified people in one room(besides tattoo
conventions) it was beautiful. Salinas has absolubtly
nothing going on as far as a night life so just about
everyone and their mamas came through. I was
having an amazing time, specially after I took the rest
of the LSD I had. Someone offered cocaine to me in
one of the back stage bathrooms, but I turned it down
cocaine is not my style. At one point I was offered to
get into a 3some with two other guys, I also turned
that down(if they were women that would be a whole
different story) over all I had an amazing experience.
Ximena Monroe performing
Rihanna’s Where Have You Been
November 22, 2012
Yes!, you are reading this right. Im giving cameras away. AGAIN!
Looking through the countless amounts of duffle bags// cases
I have(Im a hoarder) I found some gems that Im willing to barter
for the right disgusting thing//perverted imagery//weird item//
sexual favor//body part.
I thought that Oakland had stolen all the cameras I was giving
away from the last “camera swag give away” (I don’t know why
I used the word “swag” on there I feel slightly stupid and just a
tad bit like a homosexual for using such language) but as it turns
out some of the cameras were in a gold/brown duffle bag I use for
my photo shoot props(I seem to subconsciously hide things
from myself) So some of these cameras are from the previous give away.
I must admit when I got some of these cameras I knew I was gonna
put a little bit of work into them because they may have light leaks,
missing parts, or just minor fixins’. I’ll tell you which ones need
work and how to fix them, all you may need is some gum, spit,
paperclips, duck-tape, or none of those just some creative configuration.
I realize that Im not just giving cameras away, Im also giving away
precious memories that I hold dear to me. You see every camera I
have has a story to go along with it, and I remember them all.
I also lined this cameras up a while ago and forced them to watch
me masturbate and ooze my man juices all over,
does that change anything now? no? ok then lets get to it.
I love, love perverted items. Im talking about dicks, vintage pussies,
refurbished nipples, nude photos of yourself, body parts, sexual
favors, and over all weird shit. Im not selling these cameras, thats just not
the way I want to let go of these cameras/memories. Im looking
to barter, altho I can’t guarantee that what you send me will get
you a camera. I know you will be super happy with what
you get. You can get in contact with me through twitter: tiburonfb
its probably the best way of contact, and send items to
701 Lenzen ave San Jose CA 95126 to TIBURONFB
1. send me a picture (printed!!) of something perverted
you must be the one that took the photo. Self nude
portraits are encouraged.
2. Send me some crayor weird shit
3. a video of you doing something naked
it doesn’t have to be sexual(prefer if it was)
(women only, I’ve seen enough dick tricks)
Make sure you include which camera
you want things I have gotten in the past for a camera:
naked 20min hug
private kink.com bondage party pictures
wet panties a girl creamed in
Vivitar: Vista tele
This camera is dope as fuck, I came a little when I saw this
at the thrift store in Milpitas. After cleaning my boxer briefs off and
further inspection of this camera, I saw that its a point
and shoot double fixed lens. YES! DOUBLE FIXED LENS!!
meaning that it has two lenses for you to shoot with, one
telephoto and one wide angle. not only that this bitchn’
ass camera can also shoot in a full 35mm frame or
panoramic(with a simple insert on the back of the camera)
This camera is like a rare hot hermaphrodite panoramic
I got this camera from a garage sale in Palo Alto
(the rich area) the lady was telling me how
amazing this camera was and how amazing the
pictures look, about 15min later I asked her if she
had used the camera much and she said “I have
never used it” as sketch as it was I still bought it
from her. This camera looks like a plastic toy
(If you are a hipster or hipster in training this is
a must have, match it with your fedora, or hang
it from your Dali wanna-be mustache as you ride
your vintage fix-gear to the nearest peet’s coffee I don’t care)
but it takes trip-tic pictures of the same image at a slightly
different angle. Im not sure what you can do with
them negatives, except if you scan them and make a
gif(If you don’t know what a gif is I feel sorry for you son)
to make it look just like this kickassgif
bough this at a goodwill in Sunnyvale. I was minding my
own when an old lady wearing a v-neck bent over to get
a bowl from a low shelf, and her nipple was visible from
my standing angle. I stared for as long as I could, until I got cought
staring. I fastly Looked away just to focus my vision on
this beautiful exotic Asian camera(my facial expression
was the same when I see a beautiful exotic Asian girl. stupified)
I no longer cared that I was cought staring at
old lady tiddays. Just like most of the Asian girls in my life,
the camera was slightly defected. The flash won’t trigger all
the time but It should still work under sunny lighting..the
winding mechanism is weird but you will have to figure it out.
Minolta auto focus
I found this dirty little bad girl(its a girl) at my favorite
thrift shop in Milpitas. It was a cold day, I had forgotten
my jacket and was miserably paying for it. only wearing
a shirt, nipples so hard they were holding up anyone in
front of me. I was regretting the trip, until this dirty girl
flashed me her film, and warmed up my heart with a boner.
This is a beautiful medium format camera, it takes 620
film(it says it on the fucking name) that is kinda hard to
come about. It comes with a 620 film spool that you can
in a dark area, like a closet, take a 120 film unwind it and
wrap it around the new 620 film spool. problem fixed.
I responded to a craigslist ad for this camera, it was cheap
vintage, can double as a blunt weapon in danger, and has
enough room inside to hide a joint in it. I went to Berkeley to
pick up this rape bait, the guy who sold it to me called me
as I was on my way to ask me if what type of tea I wanted
so he can have it ready by the time I get to him. I arrived
to a house with handy cap ramps everywhere, and was
greeted by a way too friendly and excited to see me
wheel chaired man. We talked for a bit as he kept on pushing
the tea on me. I refused what I assumed was tea sweetened
with his man juices. He kept on mentioning
his beautiful wine cellar, I think he wanted me to ask to
see it, but little did he know I had seen that horror movie
before and wasn’t falling for it. After excusing my self for
about 25 times I finally made it out with camera in hand,
an extra free browny camera he threw in because I was
so handosme, and my asshole still virgin.
I completely forgot where I got this camera but its dope.
Trust me, YOU WANT IT!!
I picked this bad boy up in the Berryesa flea market in
San Jose where I haggled the price of the camera down from
this Middle Eastern cat who thought the camera was
made out of 14k gold. After showing him the camera’s
worth on Amazon(showed him the cheapest one I could
find) and changing the subject with pictures of naked women,
we bonded as men and eventually he gave me a good deal
for it. I was also allowed to touch his beard in a non homo
way(it was hella homo tho)
A good friend of mine gave me this camera. Vlad if you are
reading this thank you my friend but Id rather it go to someone
who will use it or will attempt to use it. I just have too many
cameras for me to use. Junior has minor leaks in its
bellows, so if you use some black cloth tape(it’s flexible and durable)
on the corners you will be set. The shutter release cord is torn.
You already have the cloth tape so put it to good use, The
shutter release cord is not the only way to fire off the shutter
so if you don’t want the cord you don’t need it. The little window
on the back with a red glass shattered so just put some of that
tape on it too. this camera works fine and is in good condition.
Shall I mention that its a medium format camera too.
I have only taken this camera to play once and was stopped
about twice by people interested in being nosy asking questions
about junior. I countered their curiosity by opening the
camera up and extending the bellows on my crotch to show
them my vintage well manufactured lens erection.
This 35mm slr has a broken mirror that throws off the focusing
slightly at times, but other than that all you need is a battery
and love. I love this camera. Its so small its crazy, and its
also the only gender-bender pentax you will ever posses.
Its petit and fragile looking, but the lens is so masculine
and phallic(like a chode) I got this camera browsing
through a Sunnyvale pawnshop looking to buy
peoples broken dreams. The cashier was cute so I was
flirting with her a little bit, when I saw this camera in the
$3.99 bin. I nearly went ape shit(in my head) so I took
it to the register right away(the price on it was $39.99)
she said it right away its 39.99. Smiling(giving her the
let me lay my dick on you girl, look) I said “its in the
$3.99 bin, lets just pretend you never saw the other price”
to my surprise it worked!!(my, let me lay my dick on you girl,
look has never worked till then) now its up for grabs.
There you have it folks. 9 cameras in exchange for your
filthy sexual juices.
October 11, 2012
I was on youtube one day looking
on instructional videos on how to make DMT
and came across a guy who threw out his
theory on what is the meaning of life at the
end of the video.I rewinded it about a dozen
times and then proceeded to write it down.
I was just drawn to it.
At the end of an epic LSD trip(read it bellow)
I looked at my phone to see that I had
sent a text to myself. What did I text myself?
you may ask?
“the meaning of life is to live,
there is more to living than merely surviving,
theory is useless without application
ergo go forth and live.”
The quote that I was obsessing over a couple
days prior. It was a trip(no pun intended) to see
it. I want to get it tattooed, but I don’t like
stand alone script tattoos so I will couple it
with something else.
October 7, 2012
I have always been bad at writing my bio or writing
in general, so when I was asked to produce a bio
for “RAW artists” a group show I got into. I knew I
was in trouble. I need writing inspiration, not just
any inspiration, drug induced inspiration.
I got ahold of some lsd, time to kill, and a
beautiful girl to experience all this with.
At the time I still had LUSTHOUSE,
and is actually one of my best memories in there.
I met this girl through a mutual friend, she came
over when I was being interviewed for the ”scenes
are temporary, movements are for ever” documentary,
I was getting make up done by my friend and she
decided to bring her along. At first sight I must
admit I fell in love with her. there she was a Mexican
girl who stood at about 5foot4, with a beautiful smile,
thick plumbed red lips, an amazing personality, super
sarcastic(I always love sarcastic girls) and a body that
I couldn’t get my eyes of off along with one of the nicest asses
I have ever seen. Over all she had a great presence about her.
We took the lsd and waited for it to hit us. We were lying
down on the floor because it was too goddamn hot,
and the floor was nice. I put on some Juan Gabriel
(the only man that gets me) “yo no naci para amar”
It hit her first, she said something about her face
melting and she couldn’t stop laughing. I was
anxious and disappointed that it had done nothing
to me at the time. Her pussy started to tingle but she
said that she didn’t like that feeling.
By the time it hit me she was in her under ware and
texting just about everyone in her phone. I got the
feeling she did’t want to be in there with me and was
texting people to come and get her, also she was
trying to get her ex to come for her. At that point I
kinda got the feeling that this might not go as I thought
it would have.
It finally hit me. It was this feeling of open thinking,
none of my thoughts were wrong, or limited.
I was feeling amazing, I couldn’t stop
thinking about Requiem For A Dream and how I just
wanted to lay there with some one that I cared about
(someone who cared about me too)
and just talk about life. I always romanticize the relationship
Harry and Marion had in that movie. At that time all
I wanted to do was enjoy and take it all in, all the beauty
that was happening within me. Light was so gorgeous
at that time, I thought it was going to make me cry.
How the light came in through the skylight, perfectly
hitting the supporting beams and the wall. It glowed.
I saw light, I know we all see light, but not only did I
see it. I experienced it.
(Requiem for a dream- this is what I felt like doing when it hit me.)
At some point she freaked out and started to cry, I tried to
hold her in my arms, but it only made it worst. I got so
scared but didn’t want to show it. I got her some water
and calmed her down, she had no idea what made her
freak out, or she just did’t want to tell me. At that point
we went for a walk, we no longer wanted to be inclosed
in the studio.
We walked out at about 10pm and it was a beautiful night.
Everything was so clear, even the darkest alley was visible
to our dilated eyes. This was the first time I actually slowed
down to take life in, I understood what “stop and smell the
roses” ment. We all think we do it but we fail miserably
at it. I was moving the earth with my feet, I wasn’t walking
on the earth, I was moving it. I was floating. Everything I
saw was filled with meaning, I saw the work that it took
to create this “fake” city life, everything is fake and somewhat
well placed. As we pass a group of guys I say hi and kept on
walking, I could hear them laughing behind me, I thought
they were laughing at me and my purple sweatshirt.
We reached a 711 where we got some drinks, I looked at
a mirror and found out what the guys were laughing at.
I was wearing make-up.
On our way back I couldn’t help but notice shadows, most
noticeably how Zevs(a French street artist) outlines shadows.
Freezing them at a time that might never come again, this
was such a revelation it blew my mind. At this point the only
thing on my mind was art. I was realizing how everything works.
Art is a drug, I didn’t get it because I wasn’t living it, I wasn’t
about it. Now I understand that I AM ART.
We kept on floating moving the earth beneath us and when we
got close to the studio we decided to
sit down at some random steps and chilled for about…
well I have no clue how long, you lose perception of time
when under lsd, we talked for what seemed an
eternity but in reality only two minutes had passed.
On those steps I understood paintings. Paintings like
“Nighthawks” by Edward hopper 1942
Before I thought it was a well done painting of a boring subject,
now I understand its beauty, the lighting, the frozen moment
in time this captures, and now a long lost innocence that life
On this steps I remembered something I read a day
prior. ” bulls are color blind, the reason for the red flag is so
that the bull doesn’t see its own blood” in life we simultaneously
play the roll of the bull and the matador. I thought of what make
me the bull and what makes me the matador. While thinking of this
I came up with an answer to a question asked by the “RAW artist’s”
online profile I had to create on their website.
WHAT INSPIRES YOU??
Bulls are colorblind. Anger gets the best of them when you wave any
colored cape in front of them. Humans we are masters of deception.
Knowing bulls are color blind we use a red cape to cloak the blood
of the wounds we inflict upon them. They are non-the wiser of
their own wounds and imminent demise, for their anger is greater
than their pain. That inspires my art. Cloaking the wounds I inflict
upon you. The world is my bullring.
(see full profile here http://www.rawartists.org/tiburonfb)
As I came to this realization we went back to my studio and drew on
a canvas, it was nothing special, but we felt creative. “imagine if we
would have taken one sugar cube?” I said and she responded with
a drawing on the canvas. Two sugar cubes with streamers, balloons,
and confetti coming out of it, or as we put it cubesquared. After doodling
for a while we made our way to Denny’s to get something to eat, at this point
it was about 2:30am. When we got there she noticed that we WE were in
cubesquared Denny’s had streamers, balloons, but no confetti. It was weird
but at this point I seemed to be the happiest I had been in a while, not because
I was on lsd but because it made me realize what slowing down to take it all in
October 2, 2012
It was a nice sunny friday beach day for me and
a couple of friends, it was 7 of us in total.
I had been wanting to fuck with shrooms for a while
but couldn’t find the “perfect day” to do them, until
I just said fuck it, its fear holding me back not time.
As we were driving there I had a conversation with
one of my friends about my unhappiness and how
I no longer was feeling like life was mine at all.
I also was telling him how I no longer understand
conversations that I get into, I understood the words
used but was unable to comprehend what was going on.
As we get to the beach I was under the impression that
we were all going to take them, shit we all had some. I believe
I took about 1/8 along with the friend that I drove to the beach with.
I had told my “guru” to guide me since he was experienced
at this kind of things.
I took the 1/8 and waited for it to take its effect on me.
At some point I got fidgety and was told that I look like I
wanted to “travel” so I was told to take a walk. As much
as I didn’t want to I did it(I was having a good time)
I walked for a couple of minutes and “felt” like I needed
to sit down. When I sat down I started playing with some
rocks that were in front of me (it was weird that there were
only rocks in front of me but not everywhere) as I was playing
with them they became puzzles to my life. I wasn’t happy with
wat was in front of me, as far as how my life was or where it
was going. I felt like the rock formations were going nowhere,
just like my life and choices I had made. My job was starting
to make me unhappy, I had been settling down into a routine
that was killing me, and my body was going to shit, along with
my relationship with my brother and my parents. I told myself
“well whats stopping me from just picking up and leaving? just
like in real life, I can just pick up and leave. Travel.” So I picked
myself up and left, leaving the rock formation behind.
As I walked I notice big piles of rocks that were so close to the
shore that waves got to them. Everyone was bare foot so they
would avoid the rocks, I trekked through them and was fairly
proud of it for some odd reason. As I had been walking for quite
some while I sat down again.
I started looking to the ocean and without knowing I was playing
out my life again with rocks and a large stick. This time I placed
myself at a better position, where I was aware of being able to travel,
avoid things that made me unhappy, and had a better mental picture
of my friends, family, and my brother. I was on a good roll with this,
but was still unhappy with my goals, schooling, and what the future
“had” for me opposed to what future I could “make” for myself. So I
picked up and left again.
A as I walked around I saw another group of rocks that once again
I trekked through. I notice a couple of guys digging a big trench that
had a roof to it, they must have been locals living on the beach front
because all the effort they put into it seemed too much for visitors.
They went along with what they were doing without looking
or giving me any attention. As I passed them I sat down again, this
time I was closer to the water, I was so close that the waves hit me.
I was playing with a thick large stick that I picked up, I started digging
with it and came across a cluster of sand crabs. 2 large ones and two
smaller ones that held on to the larger ones. They were hard to pry apart,
as I was prying them apart I kept on telling them “you will be ok, just
because you are apart, doesn’t mean that you are less close than you
already are or that you will stop being blood related” as I said this they became
my mom, dad, brother, and me. I took my brother and threw him into the
water telling him “you are smart, educated, an amazing head on your shoulders
and an amazing girlfriend who is your soul mate, you will be ok on your
own. I love you” my brother has always been the responsible one. I took
myself and threw me towards the direction I was going, not necessarily
in the water but close to the shore, I still needed to figure some things
out before I could swim. My parents had been going through some
marital problems, so I took them apart and threw them into the ocean.
They are both amazing, hard working, smart people that will make it
through anything life throws at them. If they were apart and found
their way back to each other, they could work through what ever they
are going through. As I threw t hem I picked up and started walking
I sat down and dug my feet into the sand up to my knees, looked into the
ocean and told it “you will know my name, you will know my fucking name”
Im still unsure of what that means but it seems to be a life goal of mine now.
I dug my hands into the sand and fished a base ball size rock out, this started
puzzling my life again, it was my goal. At this point I felt like I was traveled, something
I want to do, something I need to do. My life made sense at this point, I knew
that school was my way out, travel was my way out, learning how to do
things without caring about what people think is my way out,
my family is my way out. at that point I stared into the ocean and said
“you will know my name, I swear you will know my name”
I walked towards the ocean(keep in mind that I have never swam in the
ocean, and Im also not a great swimmer) and started swimming. I swam
for about 15 minutes, thats when I caught something in my mouth, something
half the size of a penny.
The oceans heart.
At that point I did a swimmers turn where you turn into
yourself and swim the opposite way. As I got to the shore I started walking
and the water turned red. Blood red. I felt as if I just went into battle and
killed so many men that the ocean was blood. It was so empowering, I have
never felt so powerful, its that kind of power that makes you laugh because
you have so much power, you are invincible. Nothing or anyone can stand
in your way. I felt like I attained what I had came for, so I started my way back.
As a man you are unaware of the power that you hold, shrooms didn’t give me
a fake perception of my power. They made me aware of my power, not just
the physical power but my mental power.
As I was walking back the crew of guys that I had passed earlier digging
noticed me. Everyone noticed me. I gave out a strong aura that it was
impossible not notice me. Every man saw me as a threat, because at
that time I could have dominated anyone with a mere look. I climbed a stump
because I need to be higher, I stared into the ocean and saw it as a threat,
something I needed to take over. At this point I saw a kaleidoscope frame in the
ocean, no color, just the framing of the shapes. I saw some large trunks made into a teepee
frame, so I climbed it to get a better view of the ocean, I had impeccable balance
and concentration. When I was done I jumped off and kept on walking, I stopped
at a breathing, living tree trunk. When I saw a piece of plastic that I couldn’t
keep my eyes off. For the longest time I had been looking for a logo, and as
soon as I saw it, it screamed LOGO!! then my vision turned tunnel vision
on this rock. A beautiful red rock. I had found my logo and the color of it.
At this point I started walking back again. Everyone noticed me.
As soon as I got to my friends they said “have you lost weight?” I pulled out
the pebble out of my mouth and showed it to my friends “what is that?”
“the oceans heart” they gave me some water. I took the pebble and swallowed it
with the water I was given. I swallowed the oceans heart.
I thought I was gone for about two hours, but it was more like 4 or 5 hours. On our way back
to the car they were filled with questions, once again I felt as if I was a warrior on a parade welcoming
me back to them. “How did the ocean feel?” “no, it’s more like how did the ocean feel with me in it?”
Im trying not to forget what the shrooms taught me, for as of that day I became a warrior.
October 1, 2012
I have been meaning to expose more about my life
and various adventures//trouble I get into, this past
six months have been insane for me with me getting
a studion (LUSTHOUSE) and experimenting with
drugs, losing my job, forcing me to give up LUSTHOUSE
and so on…
I was fortunate enough to be hired to do a photo shoot
with La Alterada Banda La Recia. This guys were going
ape shit all over the place, its what you expect out of
Mexican party boys. This guys were and still are loud,
playful, cracking jokes, making fun of one another,
and grabbing each others ass. Its this that I miss out
of a couple of friends, if they make fun of you its because
you have been accepted into their circle or they just like
you. The shoot went well. Its always a blessing when you
can have fun and get payed at the same time. My compensation
was $300 and two “magical” pills.
here are the final results of the shoot
trippin on magic